Caterpillar Contemplations

"What the caterpillar calls the end, the rest of the world calls a butterfly." Lao Tzu

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Sayonara 2011, Bonjour 2012!

The road to hell is paved with good intentions!

Hell sounds like a pretty wicked place to be so I’m going to intend away in a most goodly fashion.
But perhaps I should wrap up 2011 and tie it off with the incredible ribbon of what was …
A year of so many firsts you could be misled to believe I was back in Prep or hijacking the podium at a sport’s carnival. In fact, there are some similarities, I suffered a few restless nights before first days and held the trophy of accomplishment above my head.
The year got off to a cracking start with a short course in micro business which led me to start Echo Editing (although officially it hasn’t been launched yet as I’m still getting a website and fliers and … ). This also resulted in my first client – which was very exciting; subsequently led to my first client falling off the face of the earth – which was a little disheartening. But since I haven’t really truly launched the business yet then … well … maybe that first client can be classified as a trial run – just so my spirits aren’t diminished.
At much the same time I started teaching drama at Performing Arts Headquarters in Bacchus Marsh to kids ranging from eight to twenty. This was a breathtakingly scary thing to do and I recall spending most of term one staring into the mirror, asking myself what the f*&k I was doing. Teenagers – wow! It got better, by the end of the year it was my most enjoyable part of the week. We brainstormed and improvised a show from snippets of inspiration which led to my first co-written (with some notable students) full-length play!
Whilst I was dragged kicking and spitting (not really – but it sounds far more dramatic to say it that way) to my journalism classes – I was quite chuffed with the firsts I produced. One of which was a letter to the editor which was printed in the … wait for it … actually – don’t hold your breath – it was in The Courier.
Two of my short stories got accepted into last year’s anthology which results in my first published stories and can be purchased here!
**Don’t let the name of the author think that I’ve linked you the wrong page – that is the designers name and it’s her publishing account.
Gabriel and I had our first existential conversation when he asked the, if a tree falls in the forest question, about God – “If God created us, who created God?” – I’m telling you, it was deep.
I taught TAFE students about the wonders of writing for performance and embracing performance – which was a whole bundle of firsts rolled into one massive OMG but ended with some positive, encouraging and supportive feedback for me to teach round two (if it goes ahead).
Div, Gabriel and I went on our first camping trip with Diana and her family which was beautiful and I saw my first fish on the end of a fishing line, fresh from the lake (too small to eat though).
On joining Weight Watchers in September, I was pleasantly surprised to see that it worked (for me – perhaps more on that journey another day) and in early December was ecstatic (not an exaggeration) to see that I had dropped below the 70kg mark for the first time in four years. I am now in my healthy weight range. Go me.
I crossed off another car related goal – there isn’t a list of car related goals written somewhere, it’s just this ethereal idea I have in my head – of driving a column shift car. I don’t know what the next car related goal is or when I will accomplish it, but it’s out there – waiting for me.
Whilst the next first isn’t one I hope to repeat, it has given me a greater empathy for those who suffer from back related injuries. I was crippled (that is a slight exaggeration), with back pain when a muscle in my lower back decided to seize up. It apparently took great offence to being used for the seemingly simple task of placing an incredibly light pot plant into the boot of my car which took the slightest amount of twisting to accomplish. I have since resolved said issue with said muscle and have agreed to only lift large, heavy and awkward objects in future.
I got to experience Christmas with Div’s family up north for the first time before driving the torturous route to Main Arm (inland from Byron Bay) to visit my friend on her gorgeous plot of land – where I encountered my first roadside koala and bush turkey – fortunately both remained on the side of the road where it was safe.
Many of you would already know that my father died last year. I experienced, for the first time, looking into my father’s eyes and knowing he wasn’t there, scattering his ashes and supporting my son’s first ‘viewing’ of a dead body.
Whilst this isn’t a pleasant first to finish on – it didn’t feel right to place it amongst the others.
So whilst 2011 was challenging, it was also filled with inspirational people and experiences.
Four of my friends took up running, two of which completed fun runs – I now feel the peer pressure (of a good sort) to possibly, maybe start running myself. I’ll let you know if I’ve been swayed.
One of my Performance Workshop students beautifully rewrote a short story as a short film which led me to look at my own work and go – what if?
My drama students constantly surprised me with their wit, creativity and talent and have inspired me to seek out avenues to reconnect to my passion for performance.
One of my four running friends was also responsible for the subtle push towards Weight Watchers and well … you’ve already heard about those results. 80kg+ to 69.1kg = loving it!
My kick-ass boyfriend knuckled down to produce excellent results at uni and in the gym – reaffirming my belief that hard work and dedication pays off!
And as I’ve said before – my little guy is a constant source of inspiration. His persistence in learning to read fluently and to ride his bike (don’t give up!). The kindness he shows to kids at school (do unto others). His commitment to learning his lines for his school play (know your stuff!).
Now what?
Those good intentions …
*Write a blog every week
*Submit at least one story (or other piece of writing) to a competition
*Save some money for **** insert something rather expensive here
*Get editing work
*Write a play
*Be more understanding, compassionate and patient
*Improve my teaching skills
*Find acting classes or some other avenue to express my wanton need to perform before I shrivel up into a prune that is left in a sticky bag at the back of the cupboard that no one cleans out.
** Please note – I don’t know how to attribute photos yet … I found the image above here submitted to Flickr by uBookworm