Caterpillar Contemplations

"What the caterpillar calls the end, the rest of the world calls a butterfly." Lao Tzu


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Thanks for stew! 54/365

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I have an ongoing and long lasting love affair with stew. Comfort food ūüôā

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Thank you for play readings – 53/365

It’s tough to ‘hear’ a play in front of my computer, in my study, with only my own voice to play all the roles. ¬†And whilst I may find certain things hilarious … other (less creatively inspired (pffft!) ) people might not agree.

Last night I asked my Advanced Drama kids at PAHQ¬†to read¬†Alice in Wonderland¬†… an adaptation that I have written for our community theatre production.

It highlighted so much stuff for me – which is excellent. ¬†Means that I can have a roughly polished script when rehearsals start. ¬†I say roughly because … well there is always room for improvement or alteration once the actors get their hands on it!


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Thanks for begin-agains – 52/365

Creating new habits is hard to do!

I know because there are so many good habits I’ve tried to create over the last 20 odd years that have repeatedly failed. ¬†And yet … I’m blessed with the ability to dust myself off (after much berating and chastisement and “you’re no good”) and begin again. ¬†I may be frequently cursed with low self-esteem and depression but at the very least I don’t give up!

And often … that’s what it takes. It’s not the success that marks the journey, although it’s a hell-of-a-lot more encouraging, but the miss-steps and mistakes that build resilience and knowledge.

Over the last few years I’ve ventured into many unknown waters. I’ve felt like I’ve beaten my head against numerous brick walls, drowned a couple of times, put my confidence through the wringer and burnt the candle at both ends just to get stuff done! ¬†But I know how to do things better next time. ¬†Emphatically. Clearly pain works ¬†better than rewards for me.

So. ¬†Thanks for begin-agains. ¬†This morning, I began my Ease into¬†5k running ap again. ¬†Perhaps this time I’ll get to the end!


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I am SO grateful for coffee – 51/365

Life has been … hectic. ¬†New jobs, old jobs, jobs that climb on rocks. ¬†Early mornings – trying to fit in training at the gym. ¬†Writing an adaptation of Alice in Wonderland, leading to 2 am bedtimes are not conducive to getting up with a spring in my step. ¬†So coffee, though art my saviour when really I’d rather some shut-eye.

And none of this instant shit. Give me the real stuff.

And none of this instant shit. Give me the real stuff.

And a nice big mug of it!

And a nice big mug of it!

Perfect.

Perfect.


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I am grateful for teachers – 49/365

One looks back with appreciation to the brilliant teachers, but with gratitude to those who touched our human feelings. The curriculum is so much necessary raw material, but warmth is the vital element for the growing plant and for the soul of the child.
Carl Jung

Thank you so much to those teachers who, through insight, compassion and warmth managed to keep me afloat – despite my best efforts to vanish beneath the waves. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.


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I’m grateful for new relationships with family – 48/365

Family can be a funny ol’ thing can’t it?

And even though we can choose what family we marry into, often we don’t make that decision based on our lovers mother, father, aunts and uncles.

So I’m pleased that this weekend with my hopefully, one-day, some-day mother-in-law went so well. ¬†I really enjoyed her company. ¬†We connected on so many levels and I hope that our friendship will continue to grow over the years. ¬†We got off to a rocky start six years ago, but … water under the bridge and all that!

Today, I am grateful that I got the opportunity to forge a new relationship – may it grow and blossom.